End of the Road...

Aug. 19th, 2006 09:08 pm
lyssac: (pregnancy)

I'm eleven weeks pregnant today, except that I'm not. I went into the ER tonight. It was trivial, really. I haven't been feeling well, been crampy, and today I had a lot of discharge with some blood in it, so DH wanted me to go in, and I didn't argue too hard.

My HCG is still high, but not as high as it would be for 11 weeks. The baby is measuring 7-8 weeks, and there was no fetal heart tones. It is unlikely that this is just a case of mistaken dates with that large of a margin, especially since four weeks ago, I had a six week fetus with heart beat.

I have to call on Monday for a follow-up appointment with an OB, where they may repeat the u/s, but it looks like this is the end.

It's just like last time - my increased "morning sickness" was really a sign that my pregnancy was failing, not thriving, that small percent that you hear of losing the baby after a heart beat is detected - once again, that's me. I'm 0-4 and really not happy about it. I don't know how to do this again. I don't know how to keep doing it. I don't want to give up my dream, but I guess it's really not meant to be.

I haven't called my family, yet, and to be honest, I am really not ready to. I'm so tired.

10 Weeks ( +1 day)

Aug. 13th, 2006 01:45 pm
lyssac: (pregnancy)

Well, I guess the pain the other day was a good thing. The consensus was that it was probably round ligament pain, ie. my uterus growing and stretching. I qam inclined to believe it, since the pain stopped the next day, mostly, and that night I noticed a change in my "bump."

A couple of weeks ago, I mentioned that if I pushed on my abdomen, just above me pubic bone, that it felt hard. Well, now I can feel that same hardness from the side - a little bulge about the width of my fist and sticking out about half an inch or so. I am taking it as a good sign. If I am growing, then as far as I can tell, so is the baby. So yeah - me.

As I mentioned in my last post, this is the farthest along that I have been in any of my pregnancies, including the time that I waited to miscarry in 2004. I am more than one-quarter of the way through my pregnancy. March seems both so close and so far away, with less than seven months to go until my due date.

Speaking of growing, I forgot to mention in my post last week, but I had to start wearing maternity/nursing bras again. I had one from my last pregnancy, and went and bought another at Wal-Mart (the biggest size they had [42DD]... ugh). However, the strangest thing happened; I went to Deal$ (a Dollar Tree kind of store) and they had nursing bras there, of all things - and get this - the only size they had was mine (my non-pregnancy size, 40D). I bought three of them ($1 each) and they are more comfortable (and more flexible) than the one I bought at Wal-Mart for quite a bit more. On top of that, they are the adjustable kind (D-DD-F), and the band is also more adjustable (I have it on the smallest hooks right now) so I will still be able to wear this for quitre some time, even if I get huge when my milk eventually comes in. Talk about a major deal - and made just for me :)

So big boobs, a growing belly, and a still pregnant me... I am continuously in awe of the fact that there is another person growing inside of me - not just a son or a daughter, but a whole other person... growing... inside... of me. It is absolutely mind-boggling.

9 Weeks

Aug. 5th, 2006 12:18 pm
lyssac: (pregnancy)

I feel icky - not sick, so much, though I am, kind of. My sugar's have been in the low-normal range. I had to have the waitress bring me some orange juice last night at Barnhill's because I had waited to eat, and was shaking really bad, though my sugar was only in the low eighties, I start having hypoglycemic symptoms when it is.

My blood sugars have all been well, recently, but food is an issue. I am being extremely picky. Mealtimes are hell. I don't want anything, or we don't have a huge selection in the house... Salads with oil and vinegar dressing, and soups. If I wasn't pregnant, it would be a great diet. Right now, it is just a chore. I am either starving or stuffed. I hate food - hate it, hate it, hate it.

Ooh, I also like goldfish (the crackers) I bought two bags a few weeks ago - one of pretzels and one of whole grain cheddar, and they make good snacks here and there. I'm not overdoing it - I still have some of both.

I guess this post is mostly about food. I don't really have much to talk about. I'm pregnant, but it's pretty early, and who knows what's going on in there, since I am not vomiting on a regular basis or anything. *shrug*

I am working on my baby quilt though. It's a cross-stitch pattern with teddy bears and moons, with "I see the moon. The moon sees me. God Bless the moon. God Bless me." I really like it, and it's coming along.

I also have a crochet baby blanket around here somewhere that I should be working on. It's really funny; my husband teases me because this thing is huge. Forget a baby, this will cover a twin size bed when I am done. lol. I may start a different one, but I am determined to finish this one.

I need more crafts, interesting things to do, and puzzle books. I love logic problems. I've gone through three books of puzzles since I got pregnant.

I also got my registries mostly straightened out. I know it's early, but I like to plan for things. I also have to figure out how much money we are going to need for stuff. It is highly, highly unlikely that I will have a shower or anything, so they are mostly for my benefit anyway. I have three of them - Wal-Mart, Target, and Babies R Us. Maybe that's excessive, but there isn't too much on each one, and I like to shop around. Besides, I figured if anyone did want to buy anything, they could choose whichever was more convenient for them (or my amazon wishlist, to keep me occupied until the baby comes).

The end for now.... *yawn* (still so tired, too.)

8 Weeks

Jul. 29th, 2006 04:25 pm
lyssac: (pregnancy)

Well, this week was largely uneventful, though I did have some symptoms. I am exhausted and having trouble with insomnia again. I have also taken to taking an antacid each night before bed, because my heartburn has started to recur. (Ow, Ow, Ow - and two right now.... that hurts.)

I also had some sort of stomach bug this week. Let's just say that neither end of my gastro-intestinal track was happy and leave it at that. I have also sworn off of greasy/fried foods.... uuggh. My current favorite meal is the Simply Chicken from IHOP. It's a low-carb, low-fat, low-calorie meal consisting of (steamed?) broccoli, a pan-fried/grilled boneless skinless chicken breast, and a tossed salad with oil and vinegar dressing.... yummy. I bought salad fixings and vinegar last night at Wal-Mart.

I am on a definite "fresh" food kick - though I did ask for old-fashioned, orange powder, mac n cheese today.... it wasn't too bad (too much butter - not liking greasy, as I said) and then there was the aforementioned heart burn that almost made me regret it.

I also had what Leland is calling my first official craving this week. I made him take me to Sonic for a Creamslush (a soft-serve/icee combination that was lovely). I think I have had more food aversions than actual cravings. My grandmother used to tease me that I ate so weird that if I ever got pregnant that I might eat "normal." Leland says she is right. The biggest loss - spicy foods. Normally, I love them; right now, can't stand the idea. Weird.

My pelvic area still hurts from time to time, and I am looking forward to the second trimester when the baby moves up a bit. I have found is that at least a small part of my problem is that I sit on my tailbone, with my pelvis tucked under, and there just isn't much room in there. I have been trying to lay down/stretch out when the pain gets too bad, but it is easing off. I was looking back over my livejournal yesterday, and I noticed that I had the same kind of pain last time, around this point, so maybe it is just normal for me and pregnancy.

That's it for now. Kind of a long post considering I didn't think I had anything to add. I do think I am reconciling myself to being pregnant, and I hope that I don't have cause to regret it.

6 Weeks

Jul. 15th, 2006 06:36 pm
lyssac: (pregnancy)

This was an up and down week. Leland got hurt on Monday, I spotted a little on Tuesday and more on Friday. I also had some pain in/near my left ovary on Friday. However, I would say that I am doing ok overall.

It's still early and the last week has seemed to take forever, but at the same time, I am almost half way through my first trimester. I am sure that it will seem to fly by later, when the baby is due, or when he/she is here, but right now, March seems so very far away.

Health Status:
My Hemoglobin was 13.1, so that means I am not anemic. My prenatal vitamins seem to be doing their job.

My current weight: 219.2 lbs. (5' 7")
Total Weight Gain to Date: .6 lbs

5 Weeks

Jul. 8th, 2006 10:44 pm
lyssac: (pregnancy)

Today, I passed the five week mark, there are no real symptoms yet, but I feel exhausted. I also get some heartburn, if my stomach is empty for two long, and some occasional nausea that could be stress.

I am trying to quit smoking, which is harder this time around than any other time. I had one today, but hope to quickly change that to none at all.

I added a couple of new pics to my website, one each of me and my husband. I'm not crazy about how I look, but it's there.

8 Weeks?

Mar. 13th, 2004 03:04 am
lyssac: (pregnancy)

Supposedly, today is the last day of my seventh week of pregnancy (or is that eighth week? in that tomorrow will be eight full weeks - I'm confused)

Of course, after my ultrasound the other day, I may be off by a week and a half, and not actually be hitting 8 weeks until the 23rd.

I don't know - I do know that I am really worried about my baby, and he (or she) is almost constantly in my thoughts. I am still cramping and my lower back and pelvic area are pretty sore. I even took some tylenol, which did help me relax for a few hours, but I can't do that for nine months. It's not that the pain is so bad, just constant - with this bloated feeling and a slight burning in the muscles. It's like having a really bad period - without the period, of course. However, it is stressful, because that pain is like a constant reminder that my little one is having problems.

I'm trying to keep positive and loving thoughts and send energy to my little "bean" - I am going to take the best care of this baby that I can, now and after he's born. Keep us in your prayers.

First Ultrasound

Mar. 11th, 2004 04:14 pm
lyssac: (pregnancy)

I had some problems last night with spoting and cramping, so I called the Dr today, and they fit me in for an ultrasound and visit today, instead of next week.

Well, it's mostly good news, but not all.

We saw the baby (kind of) and it is settled into the uterus and my cervix is closed.

It measured small - at only 6w 1d +/- 2 days, rather than 7w 3d (as of LMP). We kind of expected this, though, because of my irregular cycles.

The not so good news is that the amount of the fluid around the baby is low and the heartbeat was only 109bpm. (It was nice to hear it, though)

I am on pelvic rest and he wants to see me again for an ultrasound on the 23rd, to check that I am progressing.

I am still worried, but not as scared. I hope everything works out. Looks like we are in line for a Halloween baby after all.

33 weeks to go!

Mar. 7th, 2004 04:21 pm
lyssac: (journal)

I am seven weeks pregnant now and busy. I am working on cleaning my house and getting the nursery ready (yes, I know that I have forever still, but it involves me and cleaning, so better to start early). I caved and was able to pick some things up on ebay. I also started embroidering a really cute quilt top. It seems like there is such a long time (seven months), but we have to work out a budget for what we need, and the rate at which I do crafts - let's just say that if I started it *before* I was pregnant, there would still be no guarantee.

ps. I *really* need to get a sewing machine! I have patterns and fabric - but no machine...

So tired...

Mar. 5th, 2004 11:20 am
lyssac: (baby)

I haven't had many symptoms at all so far, except I am tired all of the time.

I started cleaning up and reorganizing my office yesterday. I plan on taking it a room at a time and ending up with the nursery. it is kind of slow going and I am taking a lot of breaks, but it is good to get organized.

Somewhere I have some material and a nursery pattern set. I might make some of the baby stuff myself, but I have to find it. I don't have a sewing machine though. It would definitely be worth it to get one. My friend Kara made a lot of her own maternity clothes and they were really cute. Wal-Mart always has different materials on clearance.

I did see some really good deals for baby clothes on ebay. I can't afford them right now and it is a little early to be buying them, but it is good to know, and I'll keep an eye out.

I also signed up for some free stuff on-line and some magazines for pregnant mothers.

I am so totally into this pregnancy. It's great. I am looking forward to the next seven months.

Starting to *feel* pregnant...

Mar. 4th, 2004 03:20 pm
lyssac: (pregnancy)

I am finally starting to feel like I am pregnant. For the last two weeks, I have mainly felt pre-menstrual. That is easing off a bit now. I still have some cramping, and am starting to get a bit of nausea, but no morning sickness, thankfully.

Last night, we called my mother-in-law and my grandmother to tell them the good news. We are probably going to send out little announcement cards, but I think that I am going to wait until after my ultrasound on 3/17, to make sure everything is ok.

I am so happy, but also a bit panicked. There is so much to do, and then I'll have this wonderful little person to take care of.....

First Doctor's Appt.

Mar. 3rd, 2004 08:51 pm
lyssac: (pregnancy)

Well, I saw the doctor today and everything went really well. He decided to wait on the U/S - but just two weeks.

I'm only just over six weeks along, and if my cycle calculations are off - it wouldn't show much anyway.

He did confirm by blood test and physical exam that I am indeed pregnant - and while I did know that, it feels different to hear it from him, you know?

He seems like a good dr and I look forward to working with him.

I do have to go to the endocrinologist on Monday though... he is worried about my blood sugar. (I have diabetes related to my insulin resistance PCOS.)

I am really happy, though, and some of my worries have been eased.